Lossless Love: How to Avoid Mistakes at the Beginning of a Relationship

Doris Gordon Dating
4 min readSep 7, 2022


The psychology of men and women is like life on different planets. What happens when the planets move closer together?

The beginning of a love relationship is the most difficult, although very pleasant period. Why complex? Because it is at the beginning of the novel that the relationship between a man and a woman is so fragile that a spark from which a flame has not yet flared up can easily go out because of any trifle.

The psychology of relations between a man and a woman, like any process taking place on Earth, has certain stages. There are many of them, but today we will talk about only one — the initial one.

Is mutual affection essential?

It is easy to guess that any relationship begins with attraction. A man, captivated by female charms, begins to show signs of attention to a woman. He feels her disposition towards him, as she reacts to these signs.

At first timidly, and then more and more confidently, he continues courting the most special woman in the world for him. Admiring her external beauty, the man gradually tries to get to know the woman closer. At this stage, the so-called candy-bouquet period begins.

A woman is arranged in such a way that she is fond of a man based not only on his external data and physical form. He attracts her with his intelligence, responsibility and self-confidence. Meeting such a man, a woman gladly accepts his signs of attention. For her part, she does everything possible to maintain a man’s interest in her person.

It is at this stage in the process of getting to know each other that both parties tend to make mistakes that can lead to a breakup.

But more specifically, all the mistakes made can be divided into male and female.

The behaviour of a partner always says about the feelings

When a woman really likes a man, she always gets worried. That’s just excessive emotions and fears of doing something wrong, just lead them to a lot of mistakes that contribute to the gap.

  • Mistake 1: “Artificiality”. We have already referred to this factor as “insincerity” earlier, and this is exactly what we are talking about here. If a woman, wanting to make the best impression, begins to behave differently from her real self, then either the man will notice this and be disappointed in her, or the relationship will turn into a theater. But everyone knows that performances in the theater tend to end after the second or third act.
  • Mistake 2: “I decided everything for the two of us.” Typical situation. Only having met a man, a woman has already planned a serious relationship, a wedding, children and a happy old age. But the man doesn’t even know about it. Suddenly, he just likes a woman, and he is not averse to having sex with her, but not going down the aisle.
  • Mistake 3: when a woman provokes her partner with jealousy. This factor is called “jealousy as manipulation”. At this stage of the relationship, the man will adequately evaluate such behavior and the woman will be treated accordingly. It is a well-known fact that insecure women often use this type of manipulation to raise their own price in the eyes of the man they like.
  • Mistake 4: violation of personal space. By itself, this factor can ruin any relationship, not just romantic ones. Each partner should have personal space. This error does not only apply to women.

It may seem strange, but the mistakes in women and men are similar, they only manifest themselves in different ways.

Men not always are right

Having met a girl who managed to attract attention, men also try to like it, show their feelings and, often, without realizing it themselves, make mistakes that can quickly lead to the opposite effect and a break in relations.

  • Mistake 1: self-doubt. Women prefer confident men. If he constantly doubts and adapts only to the desires of a woman, she quickly loses interest in him. A man who is confident in himself, who knows how to make decisions and take responsibility, has a much better chance of reciprocal feelings than one who, constantly doubting, seeks approval from a woman.
  • Mistake 2: being rude. Any manifestations of bad manners prevent people from understanding each other. If a man allows himself to be rude, it can be assumed that he does not respect his companion, does not strive to make a favorable impression on her. After all, the more serious intentions a man has, the more attentive and affectionate he becomes to his chosen one.
  • Mistake 3: One of the biggest mistakes men make in relationships with women is insisting on physical intimacy. As a rule, this type of men is not inclined to think about the feelings of other people. It is important for them to assert themselves, to get the desired result. In most cases, with this approach, a serious relationship is not planned at all with a girl. It is only a means for its own self-realization. Although, in general, the topic of intimacy in a relationship is of no small importance.
  • Mistake 4: fear of showing a woman his weakness. From childhood, men are brought up in severity, instilling in them strictly “male” qualities.

Growing up, a man is terribly afraid to show some simple human feelings and emotions. He does not allow to admit to some kind of weakness, believing that it is not masculine. However, all people have emotions. It will be much more pleasant for a woman to see a living person next to her who is not afraid to show her feelings, trusting her with her experiences.

Thus, at the beginning of a relationship, men and women often make mistakes. Wisdom lies in being able to recognize them in time, draw conclusions and change your behavior.



Doris Gordon Dating

Specializing in online dating. I'll help you find love in the digital age! 💘#onlinedating 🌐 https://datingcoachesnyc.com/